tick tock tick tock

so ahhh still waiting for geodon to kick in so i can get some shut eye and its not happening. instead of it calming me down iv reved up. its frustrating! my dog is lovin it cuz iv went for 2 runs to try to get rid of some energy but so far no luck. and i read some horror stories about geodon an the side effects it has and lucky me i havnet gotten any so far. i guess thats a good thing but i wish it woulda made me sleepy. im sposed to go  on a big family camping trip tomarrow but im hoping not to be dead tired by then. i donno my mood is so up and down that maybe ill be raring to go. im really intrested to find other people with theses same issues i know its only been a couple hours since i started my blog but when your in this manic kind of mood you get antsy. i wanna hear feedback so bad i could yell about it haha in a good way! im so mad right now tho! just that i cant seem to calm down. i read on someones blog that they felt like the energizer bunny and yeah id say id have to agree at the moment. does anyone have any tricks they use to calm down? i mean obviuosly running aint doing anything for me...eek. i feel like this bipolar is getting worse by every min that goes by. i know i just started meds for it but waiting is not something i handle very well. and another ? how do i advertize my blog more? and is there any bipolar chat rooms?

love, the engine that could

the label to my problem

so i just popped the first geodon waiting to see whats going to happen.  im feeling very hyped up today and epecially right now! ya ever get that feelin when ya just cant stop moving?! its really annoying! my leg just wont stop bouncing and my heart feels like its going to pop right out of me. my mom keeps telling me how scared she is for me about all this and its really starting to bother me. i mean i know shes just being a mom but i have my own worries about things and my parents are sposed to be my backbone. my dad like always is calm and cool about it so yay daddy! my "best friend" is non exsisting through this...she was always the person who understood me the best no matter what but in the past year with the bipolar taking over we keep drifting further and further from eachother. i wish i had a bipolar friend so i could have 24/7 support and someone to go to for answers. i donno it really hurts to loose people jsut cuz my problem has a label. im hoping things get better. but what im wondering is should i just shut my mouth about this or can i acually talk about it with other friends? i mean is everyone going to give me that look and wanna run the other way? im still me...the only thing that changed is my meds. i know bipolar is more serious than like depression or something but for real people its not like you can catch it from being around me! anyways this blogging is really helping me feel like im not in a black hole by myself and id really like a friend through this and i dont know how all this works yet so if your reading this and enjoying it :) haha i donno follow me and comment!

love, the lonley ranger

man this is harder then i thought

so iv been tring and tring to get this blogging thing figured out and im not having much luck. i just dont understand how to find other people to follow with bipolar. it would would mean so much if someone could help me out.

hey again haha

hello!

so i know i just posted a blog but im new at this so theres a few things i forgot to ask and mention. im tottaly brand new at this blogging thing...so i have no idea what im doing! so id love to read other peoples blogs with bipolar and this sounds like a simple thing to do but im retared and dont know how to do it so directions please! haha gosh i feel dummb! and to go on about me personally. in the last year of struggling to find out what was going on i was hospitalized and treated for depression and anxiety (one thing youll find out about me is i CANT spell) and obviously they didnt do anything for me. iv lost my best friend and other friends cuz they think of me and a phyco or somethin i donno. im broke and now so are my parents for taking care of me. the biggest problem i would love to see get better is my spending habbits and sleeping patterns. i would have to say i dont mind when i have my "manic" moments cuz i get tons done around the house and at work! but my doctor tells me that will go away :( oh another thing that i would love to change is for some odd reason the way i cope to settle down when im really hyped up is picking at my skin! i hate it i already im not very proud of the way i look and it dosent help im covered in scares now. my legs and arms are what i pick at and it looks like i got attacked by a swarm or bugs or something! and i would love to go to school but no onw relizes how hard it is to concentrat on someonw talkking when my head is thinking of ten things already! anyways my arm is starting to hurt from typing already for some reason so ttyl!

hey nice to meet ya

hey people!

im stephanie...shnay is my alter ego im 21 and i just got diagnosed with bipolar. when i found out thats what has been going on with me for the past year instead of being upset i was glad to have an answer but now im kinda scared. im starting a med called Geodon and i have some questions about it...i hope to have answers from real people that use this med too. :) i wanna know is this going to tottally change who i am? i mean besides my exteam highs and lows i wanna know the same girl is still going to be here. and the first couple days of this med sounds so scary...is it going to be as bad as they say? and one last qustion so i have bipolar am i sposed to say "so what" or "now what?"

love,
  shnay