so i just popped the first geodon waiting to see whats going to happen. im feeling very hyped up today and epecially right now! ya ever get that feelin when ya just cant stop moving?! its really annoying! my leg just wont stop bouncing and my heart feels like its going to pop right out of me. my mom keeps telling me how scared she is for me about all this and its really starting to bother me. i mean i know shes just being a mom but i have my own worries about things and my parents are sposed to be my backbone. my dad like always is calm and cool about it so yay daddy! my "best friend" is non exsisting through this...she was always the person who understood me the best no matter what but in the past year with the bipolar taking over we keep drifting further and further from eachother. i wish i had a bipolar friend so i could have 24/7 support and someone to go to for answers. i donno it really hurts to loose people jsut cuz my problem has a label. im hoping things get better. but what im wondering is should i just shut my mouth about this or can i acually talk about it with other friends? i mean is everyone going to give me that look and wanna run the other way? im still me...the only thing that changed is my meds. i know bipolar is more serious than like depression or something but for real people its not like you can catch it from being around me! anyways this blogging is really helping me feel like im not in a black hole by myself and id really like a friend through this and i dont know how all this works yet so if your reading this and enjoying it :) haha i donno follow me and comment!
love, the lonley ranger
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thanks for reading and giving me feedback! this is the reason im doing this...to not feel alone! love you!